Resolutions

So as I'm seeing the end of 2009 come to a close, 2010 is creeping up faster than I expected. Not going home for the holidays has me here, alone in my apartment, listening to my thoughts. And I must say those thoughts are loud as hell!

There is the thought I have of my income. It's pretty rocky right now. Nothing steady but what do you expect for an unestablished artist. Well, yet to be established is a better phrase.

And then there are my career goals. My ultimate goal is to be a successful business owner. Making my money selling my art and services as a photographer. I have been searching for my confidence for most of my life and I have become in tune with it as I grow in New York City. I've met more people here to bring out the best in me and it's a good feeling.

But in my search for what truly makes me happy, I tend to spend time making others happy and neglecting my needs. Now I can only speak from a woman who is in her mid 20's, childless and career driven's perspective. At this time in my life all my priorities should be on me. But I am a people person and always let other's, good and bad, consume the time that I need to spend on myself. Now I'm not saying that I want to be totally self consumed. Not at all. I'm saying that I need to focus on my career. Cuz let's face it, bills gotta be paid! :)

So with that said I am focusing more on keeping up with this blog about my life and "pursuit of my happiness as an established artist. I will be giving myself weekly assignments to make my photography skills stronger. As my dad would say, "You gotta take baby steps." I have just realized that I have never been a patient person. Patience is keep to make anything successful.

I'm thinking of two quotes to end with that fit this situation. The first is Langston Hughes and his poem "A Dream Deferred":

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

And the last quote is about from Saint Francis de Sales about patience:

"Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections but instantly set about remedying them - everyday begin the task anew."